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SchoolBiscuit

Nation celebrates ‘prettiest A levels ever’

more certificates than ever received A* grades

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Buyers of Che Guevara T-shirts to undergo basic education in irony

‘Focusing on basic history and the concept of irony, the course will address the key thinking deficits that inspired this inexplicable purchase.’

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Creationist school appears out of nowhere

God knows where it came from‘Today the kids have Intelligent Design and Technology in which they have to devise and build their own ark. Then, this afternoon, it’s double pseudoscience followed by flat earth geography.’

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Mills and Boon sex education textbooks criticised for glamourising the unquenchable fires of love-play

ripping yarns‘Penchant for exhilarating sex with topless manual labourers, whose skin glistens in the morning sun like fresh dew on a rosebud.’

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‘I can stay here just as long as you can,’ negotiator tells striking teachers

‘We can stay here all day if necessary,’ said negotiators. ‘It’s your own time you’re wasting.’

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