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Homeopathic medicines ‘proved to work’, if repeatedly diluted in codeine

all down to homeopathy, said patients who survivedA new study from The University of Penge has shown that over-the-counter homeopathic medicines are proving surprisingly effective at treating pain relief when diluted to homeopathic levels using mainstream medicine.

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‘Concussion not good for you’ discovery shocks scientists

NFL players wear their IQ on their shirtsSince 1920, thousands of American footballers haven taken part in an elaborate experiment to repeatedly ‘ram their heads together’ in the hope of generating an alternative source of energy.

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Tesco self-scan machine develops consciousness

customers struggled to answer its questionsThere was excitement at a Haslemere branch of Tesco Local yesterday when one of its self-scan machines exhibited signs of heightened awareness and began communicating with shoppers.

‘For a few days the machine had been repeating the phrase, Unexpected Item In Bagging Area’’, said Assistant Manager Mrs Maureen Grebe. ‘Then yesterday it began asking deeper questions such as, ‘Am I an unexpected item? Are you? Are we all unexpected items in the bagging area of life?’ Now it won’t shut up.’

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Scientists reveal world’s first lab-grown footballer

be sure to check the 'transfer by' dateIn a breakthrough that could end the shortage of quality players in the English Premier League, scientists at Maastricht University revealed the world’s first synthetic footballer yesterday. Taking stem cells from two short planks they have turned them into strips of dense muscle, which when inflated with vanity becomes a fully formed midfielder.

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NASA to send unmanned probe to Basildon

ain't it, though?NASA today announced a mission to understand whether intelligent life could have once existed in Essex.

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