In an unprecedented display of unity, footballers from all across the UK have come together in London to demonstrate their revulsion against the terror attacks by opponents of rape on former Sheffield United footballer Ched Evans. Crowds several thousand strong drove their Bentleys slowly around London in protest last night, while dozens more sympathisers changed their Facebook profile photo to declare ‘Je suis Ched’.
A top professional football mascot has announced that he will be coming out before a Premier League game. The mascot will reveal himself this Saturday but details about which club he represents are being kept secret until just before kick-off.
In a statement to the Daily Mail the mascot, who has the stage name of Mr Sprinkle said, “I’m coming out about my homosexuality because I want to move the discussion about homosexuality among professional football mascots forward.”
It is understood that the widespread abuse he relentlessly receives as a result of his poor decisions has already gone some way towards preparing him for the new role.
A football match between the British and German armies, which was organised to commemorate the 100th anniversary of the famous Christmas truce in the trenches in 1914, has sparked a diplomatic incident after ending in a massive brawl.
“We’re very upset”, Palace manager Neil Warnock stated, “because last season we took our own ball to Old Trafford and they promised they would bring the ball next time.”