top of page
Search

Farage spent £5,000,000 on anti-milkshake security equipment


Claiming the £5,000,000 grift, sorry gift, was for personal security, The Supreme Leader of Reform spaffed the whole lot on state-of-the-art anti-milkshake technology:

• Low orbit dairy drink detection satellites


• A small portable Surface to Milkshake missile system


• Paper Straw proof vest


• Milk stabilisation robots, to slowly stir any milk rather than violently agitate it


• Lessons in not being a racist bell-end – (unfortunately he did not any)




bottom of page