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Government celebrate as travel delays not caused by Brexit

"This is excellent news", enthused Jacob Rees-Mogg, "Dover's at a standstill, there are three hour queues at the airports and it's simple incompetence, nothing to do with Brexit. What's more, if Britain was still under the EU jackboot, they'd have banged on about foreigners, of all people, being held up but now there's nothing they can do."

Ron Jenkins of Clacton was planning a long weekend "sur la continent" was equally delighted.

"I've spent most of the last 4 hours reading my brand new passport, rejoicing in its blueness, or is it black? Anyway, I've read it from the first "His Britannic Majesty" to the final "made in Poland" and it made me feel proud to be British, even more than looking at the out of order passport machines."

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