There is pressure on the government to clarify what ministers can legally be called. A website where people could submit suggested insults has repeatedly crashed because of overloading.
"'Tory scum' is obviously fine", explained a spokesman, "and we would request people not to keep suggesting that one. 'Bell end', 'muppet', 'tosser' and 'yogurt brain' are already under study."
A committee of experts comprising Justin Welby, the Archbishop of Canterbury, a professor of Anglo-Saxon and a vet are evaluating the possible names.
When approached for a comment, the Reverend Justin Welby said that "'dick-head' was quite a popular choice, but in my view, doesn't go far enough. Personally, I'd calling them all ******* *****"
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