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Grammys introduces new "hold music" category

It was announced today that the Gramophone Music Awards, aka Grammys, are introducing a new category for the hold music you hear when trying to get through to any public service. "People often assume hold music is written by regular songwriters, who set aside their worst compositions for the purpose," said hold music composer Graham Sawdust today.

"In fact, there's a select few of us who specialise in it. It's actually quite hard to write music that's so irredeemably, soul-sappingly awful that people put down the phone rather than hear it again. Which is of course the intention." Asked whether he writes anything else, Sawdust said he does occasionally come up with something that's pretty dire, but not quite bad enough for hold music. "In which case, I sell it to Taylor Swift."

Music like this, intended as hold music but subsequently recorded by well-known artists, already has its own awards, the MOBOs (standing for "Music of Bland Origin").

By Eppursimuove

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