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Marriage saved by turning mobile brightness to max

Glen (37) and Diya (38) attribute their continued love to suddenly seeing their browsers in vivid detail and not having to squint so much. Diya claimed: 'It was as if the scales had fallen from my eyes. Everything seemed positive, achievable, even Brexit.'

'I know you're told not to do it, but I just thought, what the hell? Marriage counselling had failed, so why not turn things up to max, make things brighter. And you know what? I begin to see Glen in a whole new light - at least 5% brighter.'

Mobile phones have explicit warnings that increasing luminosity will result in instant death and the collapse of civilisation or, at the very least, a significant drain on your battery. Diya gushed: 'In life we just need to give 100%...oh, phone just went dead.'


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