Reform UK becomes KU Mrofer to wipe slate clean

Reform UK was only founded eight years ago,' said a rants-man for the former party, 'but it became so overwhelmed by allegations of sleaze and racism that we have shut it down and started up the all-new, squeaky clean KU Mrofer.

'It sounds a bit suspiciously foreign and exotic, 'KU Mrofer', but we swear it's as exotic as a full English breakfast and a Rothmans afterwards.

'And our leader, who never appears in the Commons any more because they keep swiping his prayer card, has stepped down in favour of an all-new leering charlatan called Legin Eragaf.

'Just let them try pinning anything on Legin in a Parliamentary Standards Committee hearing. We just invented him, so he's as pure as the driven snow. 'But if anyone feels like loading some crypto-currency into the Legin Eragaf account, for whatever reason, I'm sure he wouldn't refuse it.'