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UK takes the lead in Covid Olympics

Long before the athletics starts, the UK is already leading the medal table with eight self-isolations and a bronze medal in track and trace. Prior to the starting pistol going off, Britain has surged ahead with transmission surges.

During events, athletes will have to clear vaccine passport hurdles, sprint for vaccines and take a hop, skip and jump based on sketchy data. The Head of GB Athletics spoke of their pride: ‘We have golds in infection rates, corruption and Mo Farrah has a tickly cough’.

The Games will culminate in the Covid Relay, where British runners pass infected phlegm from one to another, over 100m and 400m. The closing ceremony, as hospitalizations peak, will be followed by the closing of the NHS.

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