US asks Ukraine for missiles

As the US is burning through its missile stock, with more cruise missiles fired on Iran in three days than supplied to Ukraine in four years, the US has found that specialist weapons can't be generated overnight.

'We've been supplying Ukraine with missiles and now they are building their own. They must have loads now,' said a Pentagon official, 'unless they've been using them,' he added, admitting he 'only reads US news, mainly the sports pages'.

Apparently Europe and the UK have stockpiles of missiles but won't sell them to the US in case 'they decide to attack us next. It's not like they're acting rationally,' said practically everyone in Europe.