Despite a definite proclivity for procreation, Conservative MPs are believed to be seriously in decline. While more than 300 are currently known to be in the wild, it is expected that within less than two years there may only be a handful left roaming the corridors of Westminster. As a result the World Wildlife Fund has declared the Conservative MP to be an endangered species.
'Support the WWF and all the good work they do,' implored one of the few surviving Conservative MPs. 'Donate £3 a month to the WWF to help them continue to campaign and whatever else it is they do with the money. If every voter in the land donated £3 a month to the WWF then they wouldn't need to run adverts with doe -eyed pandas ever again. Better still, donate it direct to the Conservative Party. Yes, donate £3 a month to the Conservative Party, starting now. Better still, make that £3 a day to the Conservative Party. If every voter donated £3 to the Conservative Party I wouldn't have to worry about working ever again. Better still, donate £3 a day to me, direct, in a brown envelope to save me worrying about tax,' he added.
A WWF spokesperson confirmed the endangered species element. 'No idea why they are becoming so rare,' he said.