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Drawings of cocks will still count as votes



Voters are being warned that spoiling your ballot paper by drawing a cock and balls on it may not prevent it being counted as a vote. The Electoral Commission said that such actions will be interpreted as portraying a preference for the biggest knob amongst the candidates.


However, this will be done on a constituency by constituency basis, so that drawing a prick will not necessarily be considered as a vote for Rishi Sunak, Sir Keir Starmer, or even that LibDem bloke, even though they are all regularly compared to male members.


One thing is clear however. Since Nigel Farage declared that he would stand, it has been decided that any drawings of female genitalia will be counted as votes for Reform UK.


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