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Incompetence to be inducted as fifth horseman of the apocalypse

After a wide ranging review by self-styled, organisational development ‘experts’, a fifth horseman of the apocalypse is to be appointed. This recognises that, in 2022, there is a very significant amount of extra work for the horsemen, and that this cannot be delivered to a high standard by the existing workforce.

A spokesman said that the contributions of war, famine, pestilence and death remains as valuable as ever and continues to be visible across the globe – in Syria, Lebanon, Ukraine and elsewhere. However, recent events in the political sphere have made it clear that incompetence has a valuable role in delivering the coming apocalypse. Pestilence has accepted that failing to deal with hospital waiting lists, for example, doesn’t fairly fall under his remit. The four existing horsemen are united in welcoming Incompetence to the team, and are looking forward to accelerating delivery of the coming apocalypse, in line with their five year strategy.

The spokesman said that events in the UK over the last five years had demonstrated the contribution of incompetence, citing Brexit, Covid (including failure to lockdown, PPE contracts and discharging infected patients to care homes) and the recently withdrawn UK-Ireland World Cup bid as particularly strong examples.

Headhunters are now working to recruit the new horseman and are pursuing a number of strong candidates currently working in the field of politics, but who are expected to become available very soon.

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