CelebBiscuit
Sir Elton John says he and husband David Furnish are planning to go ‘carb neutral’ in an effort to save the planet. The chubby singer/songwriter said that from now on, every time he eats a pie he will offset the carb footprint by planting a stick of celery or munching on a carrot stick. [read...]
Dissatisfied with the Conservative Party’s recent performance in government, lead singer of the Happy Mondays, Shaun Ryder, has declared his intention to enter the race to become party leader and Prime F***ing Minister. [read...]
Donald Trump has sensationally stormed out of Buckingham Palace following reports of a bitter row with the Queen. It has emerged that, over lunch, the US president broached a previously undeclared matter – his plans to develop an exclusive golf club in the grounds of the palace, [read...]
DJ Danny Baker has begged for one more chance to maintain his image as honorary third member of Chas n Dave, after being sacked from his job of being a bit of a geezer. ‘Look it woz only after a butchers in the mirror that I realised a stupid titfer had somehow descended on me… [read...]
Barista Tracey Collins, 23, from Droitwich, is looking forward to a life without having to pay tax after she realised that, just like TV host Lorraine Kelly, she too has to ‘put on a persona’ to do her job. [read...]
