UK-Biscuit
Following the death of her husband, Elizabeth Windsor is set to move out of the family homes and head for a life in the sun. “One has always wanted to chillax Balearic-stylee” said the nonagenarian, [read...]
Peak ill discipline has been reached, wankers. So says a report produced by a coalition of parental groups. And who is to blame for this decay in the very fabric of our society? It’s children. [read...]
Fears that balding men across the UK – unable to get a proper haircut during lockdown – have once again reverted to combing wisps of hair over the bald patches on their head. The practice of combing unsightly wisps of hair over the head in order to hide a bald patch – [read...]
The UK government has passed an Act declaring that April Fools’ Day is to be made illegal throughout Great Britain and Northern Ireland. Anyone caught breaking the law will be fined 20,000 Bitcoins, and could face up to 400 years in a care home. [read...]
As the NHS finally takes well-earned respite from the coronavirus pandemic, hospitals are now bracing for a new wave of patients, in dermatology. The Met Office has predicted the UK will experience a warm spell of weather to coincide with the relaxation of covid restrictions and the placement of mountains of barbecue paraphernalia at strategic… [read...]
