To packed conference in California, Google co-founder, Sergey Brin revealed plans to manufacture a vehicle that will allow BBC presenters to focus less on steering and more on ‘pejorative terms for Asians’.
Google, Bing and the other search engine have been deluged with requests from people asking to remove details from their past that may appear when people put their name in a thingy. But many found they couldn’t remember exactly what it was they wanted removed.
One man from Cheltenham whose name can’t be used because we’ve forgotten it said; ‘Better safe than sorry. If people put my name in Google or Crosby they’re sure to find out stuff that, frankly, I’d rather not remember. So much so that I can’t even remember it now. But that’s not the point. I don’t want to remember it, whatever it was, so best if I ask the internet search engine to remove all stuff that comes up that is linked to my name.’
The use of pioneering new quantum goal-line technology developed by the Schrödinger Research Institute in Berlin, which was intended to be the most accurate ever, has resulted in a near infinite level of confusion in the German amateur league where it is being trialled.
The documents leaked by Edward Snowden have yielded what may be their most shocking revelation yet: plans to infect millions of computers with malware to prevent them from working properly. This was devised by the NSA in consultation with a shady billionaire, unofficially named as ‘Bill Gates’, who had close links to many different arms of the US government.
Thousands of Facebook users have been left disappointed after a newly-released feature enabling users to view a 90-second clip of their friends’ ‘highlights’ since joining the network has left many facing the realisation that their friends are, in fact, ‘rubbish’.