DI Dave Hanson investigates romance scams for the National Crime Agency. ‘It’s a pretty unpleasant crime’, he told NewsBiscuit. ‘Typically a victim will fall for an AI-generated image and a hard luck story and soon they’re sending thousands of pounds abroad to help the “love of their life” relocate to the UK – except the person doesn’t exist. ‘It’s humiliating for the victim and we never catch anybody because they’re abroad and they’ve got computers. You can’t expect us to co

Opening with a sigh and a heartfelt "F***ing hell", King Charles startled the nation yesterday with a 15 minute tirade which covered a wide range of topics including Andrew Windsor, Donald Trump, the scarcity of red squirrels and the obligation to wear kilts. The expletive laced broadcast ended with His Royal Highness dropping his mic and kicking over the camera. Image: temsin_ - Pixabay www.newsbiscuit.com

.

.

The Royal Society for the Protection of Burglars has urged people with garden sheds to leave out seed balls, lumps of lard, Rolex watches...

A father of two was described as the most shocked individual present during his household’s Christmas celebrations, after watching his children open a series of gifts he had never seen before. Witnesses say Tom Perry, 42, was visibly surprised as each gift was unwrapped, audibly gasping at items that appeared to align uncannily well with his children’s personalities, interests, and correct clothing sizes. “Wow,” Perry exclaimed, after one present was opened. “I never knew the

.

Has the conversation gone stilton at the Christmas dinner table? As dry as that turkey? Just go round trying to say these words out loud while you all get totally smashed. It's as contagious as herpes and more addictive than gambling-cocaine. moyder - If you're thinking Max from Hart to Hart , then you're too old for this shit. Nope. Not a New Yok accent. Not Bwoston ether either. It's north Nuw Jorsey. poyfect - Is it Rosemary, the telephone operator? From Hong Kong Phooey ?

Greetings, earthlings. It's a great Christmas with prices lower than they were in 1925. If you got two dolls for Christmas that's plenty. No-one needs more than two dolls, except Sleepy Joe Biden and Crooked Hilary, Randy Andy and Dozy Don. I have brought peace on earth. I've ended wars in Gaza, Crimea, Greenland, Venezuela, Brazil, LA, Chicago and Kyiv. I'm taking Greenland because we own it, just like Vlad owns the Donbas. Donbas was named after me, you know. I've named oth

.

.

.

Yes, it’s that time of year again. Sod all in the news, and the only thing you could find for your significant other was a windscreen...

It’s Christmas. And Christmas means round-robin letters from distant relatives that you only hear from once a year. Usually, it’s the correspondence equivalent of watching paint dry – first words, first babies, first offence, first bus driver, first conviction. You know. There’s always a germ of truth, but you always wonder how much. Anyway, the Slagg family, from Sunderland, have written (or possibly dictated) a round-robin letter that has gone viral because of its brutal ho

Scrooge shook his quill, then slipped a bony finger into the ink pot, confirming that it was dry. ‘Cratchit!’ he shouted, causing young Bob to snap his head up, fear in his eyes. He realised that the ink pot was dry and Scrooge was angry. ‘I’ve been thinking,’ growled Scrooge, fixing young Bob’s stare. ‘You’re right. Let’s close up, scoot to Spoons, get shit-faced and we can pick up a turkey from Tesco on the way home for Mrs Cratchit,’ he said. Bob relaxed. ‘And tomorrow – C

The government has decided that this year, tax inspectors will follow Santa Claus and assess the value each present delivered before imposing appropriate VAT and import duty on it.  The inspectors will also measure the distance covered by Santa's sleigh and calculate the mileage charge payable. This is before visiting Santa's workshop and checking the elves' timesheets and wage slips before imposing the correct employer's NI and pension contributions.  Officials will also che