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Friends angered by boy’s decision to move Subbuteo World Cup to winter

Friends of 9-year old Toby Brown have reacted angrily to the news that the Subbuteo World Cup they had planned for this summer has been put back to December.

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Christmas to be moved to accommodate Qatar World Cup

a gift from Santa BlatterRepresentatives of Europe’s biggest Christian groups had said that they were against a winter World Cup on the grounds that it would overshadow the build up to the annual festival, popular for about the last 2000 years, but FIFA President Sepp Blatter argued ‘Compromises will need to be made. There’s no reason why a religious festival celebrated by millions around the world shouldn’t be moved.’

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UK Gold secures rights to show replays of all Premier League games from 1992

Miranda will be the mascot for each team, whether they like it or notPremier League Chief Executive Richard Scudamore has announced that the rights to show full replays of all 38 Premier League games played in the 1992/93 season have been sold to the TV channel UK Gold for an undisclosed fee.

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Kim Sears’ Scottishness training coming along ‘very f**king nicely’

F*+&$@#^ W'&*%£$"*&^>*Kim Sears attempts to become more Scottish ahead of her marriage to Andy Murray appear to be well on track. Following her expletive-laden attack on Thomas Berdych in the Australian Open semi-final Murray told press that Kim is taking in lessons in swearing and invective in order to make their wedding day a truly authentic Scottish occasion.

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Sporting excellence linked to quality of bedtime stories

Voldemort spurs them onHaving discovered that sleeping patterns impact on performance levels, researchers at the University of Birmingham have now revealed that top athletes perform best when their passage from wakefulness to sleep includes chapters read from Harry Potter, with all the voices ‘done by a grown up’.

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