Stretching many to breaking point, various media platforms have pledged to tell only the truth - as a ‘hilarious’ prank - on 1st April.
Unable to use any of their regular programming, Fox News will show ‘Test Card F’ - the girl and creepy clown doll playing noughts and crosses because, presumably, every else is dead. A Fox News spokesman said ‘Post-apocalyptic horror is our jam anyway. The girl is white, so our viewers will be in their comfort zone.’
Every professionally furious gammonati columnist at The Daily Express will write their version of ‘Diana – my People’s Princess masturbation routine’. Fortunately they will go unread as the pages are stuck together.
Newsbiscuit only speaks the truth and is totally unaffected, while Facebook reverts to being solely a birthday reminder service.
10 Downing Street has declined to take part, saying: ‘Never apologise, never explain. If in doubt, lie.’
Image: AbsolutVision | Pixabay
First published 1 April 2022
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- NewsBiscuit
- Apr 14, 2025
April 2024
The blue team continued to struggle on in government as speculation about (and betting on) the date of the election continued. Looking back, with 20:20 hindsight, the general view was that the Tories were toast. Burnt toast. This didn’t stop them from taking a hard line on benefits and woke, snowflake, working from home.
Scotland had political problems of its own as the SNP and Green Party ‘consciously uncoupled’, bringing down another SNP leader.
In overseas news, shiny faced David Cameron was inexplicably being Foreign Secretary, and Venice was implementing a tourist tax, as it felt that pizza and ice-cream sellers were getting too much of the action. And the Republicans continued to make things tough for ‘Sleepy Joe’.
Here is a selection of the top stories that month, loosely organised by topic. Click through to read the stories and the author credits. Scroll down to see some of the month’s best headlines. Recycling is good, right?
UK Politics
US Politics
Overseas News
Other nonsense
Selected headlines from April 2024
Sunak's master plan to win election is to defect to Labour
Struggling acetone manufacturer insolvent
Ofsted's unwillingness to end one word assessments judged - Appalling
Civil servants picket their own gardens in working from home dispute
Humza Yousaf leaves his greens
Grimsby becomes the first city to pay tourists £5 a day to visit
Man who botched making a cup of tea gets a re-straining order
Producers of King Arthur epic say it's not set in stone
Humza, You's Off
Sick notes only to be given out by coroners, says Sunak
Rishi Soon-out
Man who 'lit up every room' buried with his favourite torch
April Fools joke both funny and well executed
Picture credit: Deep Dream Generator