NewsBiscuit

The news written by you…

ArtsBiscuit

Eddie Izzard wins bid to play Nicola Sturgeon in SNP biopic

the perfect man-woman-socialist-third-way guy-girl-dude for the role‘Once you see Izzard in costume for the role, you’re hit by how the similarities are staggering,’ said friend and agent Jim Murphy.

Read more >



Cameron slaughters shadow cabinet after watching Game of Thrones

thine shall be mine...The election took an unexpected turn today, when the entire shadow cabinet was butchered after visiting Number 10 for ‘a chat over tea and cakes’.

Read more >



Man avoids Game of Thrones spoilers by masquerading as PM

as close as you can get to the real thing‘I had reservations at first; I don’t know much about keeping the interest rate from dipping below inflation, but weirdly it doesn’t seem to matter. If someone asks me a question I just say ‘a fair deal for honest, hard-working Britons’ or ‘I have complete faith in Mr Osborne’ and they seem satisfied with that.’

Read more >



Dick Dastardly in ‘despicable negotiations’ to present Top Gear

Twat, and Double Twat!Health and safety-flouting novelty rally driver Dick Dastardly is said to be locked in ‘despicable, underhand negotiations’ with BBC executives, for the post of chief host of flagship motoring show Top Gear, recently vacated by Jeremy Clarkson.

Read more >



BBC to reintroduce homeless Stig into the wild

some say, it's all gone to cockFollowing the sacking of Jeremy Clarkson and the abrupt ending of Top Gear, the BBC have pledged they will help resident test driver The Stig and ensure he can rejoin the general public.

Read more >