Obese man wins right to McDonalds bypass
A 22-stone man has been told he can have a ‘life-saving’ gastric bypass built around his local McDonalds, despite losing a legal case after being rejected for it previously.
HealthBiscuit
Woman disfigured by chimp ‘feels safer’ after mandrill face transplant
A woman left disfigured by a violent chimp unveiled her new face last night. Keen to avoid any future attacks, doctors have replaced her face with one from a much more intimidating primate.
Dumpiness epidemic caused by widescreen TVs, say experts
The increasing numbers of squat and dumpy children in British families is not due to poor diets and a lack of exercise as first thought but is, experts believe, a symptom of the proliferation of widescreen televisions in the nation’s homes.
Slackers launch ‘Sickie’, the new charity for sufferers of minor and fictitious ailments
The new charitable foundation supports the millions of Britons whose work ethic is undermined each week by debilitating complaints such as chapped lips, pins and needles and dandruff.
NHS reforms to be allowed to ‘die with dignity’
David Cameron has confirmed that the government’s NHS bill will have its life ended by politician-assisted suicide. ‘We tried everything to save it,’ said Mr Cameron, ‘but the condition is terminal. We have therefore decided that the time has come to put it out of its misery.’
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