A spokesman for the Prime Minister has provided a press release confirming that the PM will be joining Reform 'sometime soon, probably before the next election.'  He said Starmer had paid Nigel Farage for membership already, apparently they were next to each other waiting to vote on something and Farage accepted £23 'for cash'.  The PM, apparently had been waiting for an opportunity to do it, but never seemed to catch the Reform leader in the House of Commons that often and d

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Months on from his infamous speech, Sir Keir is adamant that he did not misspeak and that Oct 7th was all about bangers- and not the bomb kind. While Hamas have agreed to release Israeli hostages, Starmer is insistent that the sausages be released first. A spokeswoman for No.10 said: 'Sir Keir has been clear from the start. No sausages. No deal. And yes, he would like some chips with it.' 'It is inconceivable to suggest he said sausages by accident, because he was cynically e

The Tories got a lot of media attention for their misspelled chocolate bars with 'Britian' written on them at last week's party conference.. Keen to cappitalize on this, and to secure more meeja attention, the Tories are publicising their misdirected policies with misspelled press releases. The top pollicies are: Abbolishing stamp duty on houses, to help the ritch Stopping asilum seakers Abbolishing the sentencing council, and the spelling counsel Leaving CHER Raising standar

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It's understood an X Factor Winners' reunion bash, scheduled for December at London's swanky Dorchester hotel, had to be cancelled due to...

Overweight and under-educated Englishmen have confirmed their intention to continue providing unsolicited wisdom to a world which barely deserves them. ‘Stands to reason, dunnit?’ said one obese cretin whilst painting a Cross of St George on a mini roundabout. ‘British Empire - greatest empire the world has ever seen. Hovercraft, penicillin, jet engines – the modern world wouldn’t exist without Ingerland’. The EU has expressed ‘deep gratitude’ for the continued dispensation o

Disney announced today it had given the go-ahead to a new film, Lady and the Trump. The film tells the story of a nice, well brought up...

' British adverts contain too many cats,' claims the Daily Mail today.  'Despite cats only living in fewer than 30% of British...

Heartening news has emerged today that the man who has his hand on the tiller of the good ship UK, PM Boris Johnson, has rewarded himself...

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Winner: TonyMc Runners-Up: "Waylon never could figure out why so few people came to Book Reading Circle when it was his turn to host." (Midfield Diamond); "Ike would finish the chapter and then check if the hogs had finished eating that prying lawman." (Lockjaw)

The Nobel Foundation, based in Sweden, today announced that Donald Trump has been awarded a special Nobel Participation Award in...