Jeremynh has had another stormer of a month, followed by the ever reliable Deskpilot. In third place with a comendable score is scottfutile, a relative newcomer to this site, Tbanks to everyone who pitched this month, regardless of whether you were successful or not.
As usual all the published subs with links are listed below the leaderboard, then the cartoon of the month, then the full list of headlines published this month.
Front Page, News in Brief and Features
apepper
bartleby
bbi
Danny Soz
Deskpilot
Dominic_mcg
eppursimuove
Gerontius
ian searle
James_Doc
jeremynh
Lockjaw
lucienne
Midfield Diamond
Modelmaker
Newsbiscuit Editorial Team
rogt
Scottfutile
Sir Lupus
stewartbarclay
Sully
Throngsman
Walter Eagle
Wrenfoe
Published cartoons this month came from Lockjaw, Modelmaker and sdferris5
Cartoon of the month goes to sdferris5 with Ukraine talks snagged on a matter of protocol
Headlines
benvoleo
“It’s not a miracle, I’m a doctor”, says Jesus
bigbadbob
Number 10 dismisses claims of being dismissive
Deskpilot
Ceasefire not worth the paper it isn't written on
Hollywood studios drafted in to sex up Hormuz blockade
Larry the cat to leave Downing Street after vetting row
Mandelson prime suspect in new leak inquiry
Meghan tells Bondi shooting survivors 'we're victims too'.
NASA defunded as no moon features named after Trump
National Grid suffers internet pile on
Poorly performing hairdresser fails to make the cut
Starmer to reinstate Sir Olly Robbins so that he can sack him again, properly
Student loan interest capped at 'still too high'
Trump says UK has no claims over Scotland
Trump sends out for more TACOs
Trump: pilots who get shot down are total losers
Washington chef regrets serving bang bang chicken
World champion campanologist may have used a ringer
dominic_mcg
Marmalade producers in a jam
Met to investigate after Kenyan national chased through streets of London
gerontius
Car companies to offer £700 compensation or a free overnight battery top up
granger
Ceasefire doesn't include journalists, confirms Satanyahu.
Trump's truce won't slow genocide plans, confirms Satanyahu
Viktor becomes Loser
hokeyloki
Starmer considers assassination attempt to boost polls
ian searle
BBC grateful The Met have nothing on Carol Kirkwood
Martin Clunes prepares for next high profile celebrity role
ian Storm Dave: Met Office issues a Trigger Warning
Waiting times for urinals slashed
Artemis capsule to splash down in Strait of Hormuz
Families stay up late to watch first war crime on TV
LGBT lions celebrate Gay Pride month
Whack job president calls gunman a whack job
lucienne
Bullets refuse to engage with Donald Trump
King and Queen to welcome Charles and Camilla to US
mcdabble
Abbott: Mandelson had to resign five times before, no, 300 times, no, 14 times
Boots on the ground still up in the air
Brent Crude to be offered in 2026 limited edition mini-barrels
experiment: How hard are Greenland Inuit, on a scale of Venezuela to Iran?
Government under pressure to subsidise helium balloons
Kanye Just Not?
Man in pub has AI model too powerful to release to general public
'Marmalade' is a codeword for 'Democracy', says Reform
NASA concerned that Artemis astronauts may not want to come back
Starmer asks, "Did I pass security checks?"
To a gangster every treaty looks like a protection racket
Trump offers to sell Falklands to Argentina
US Navy Secretary Jumps Ship
mick turate
Trump crucified for Jesus video
Arthur Daley passes Reform UK vetting checks
Jeffrey Epstein noted by his absence from White House State Dinner
MPs divided on under 16s; but agree US President should not use social media
Pupils sent home for failing to wear official school stab vests
rogerg
Gap between reality and delusion named the Gulf of Trump
rogerg
Keir Starmer never told he was Prime Minister
USA visit, King Charles told 'don't miss'
rowly
Argies plan to refloat the Belgrano
BBC launches new series: 'No Minister'
J D Vance 'I have in my hand a piece of paper ...... it's a return ticket'
'Net Zero' policy is full of holes
sinnick
All of the Grand National horses claim 'I am Maximus'
steveb
Pope posts fake images of America being led well
Trump invades Vatican City
stewartbarclay
Trump: 'Open the Straits of Hormuz or I'll thkweam and thkweam until I'm thick'
sully
Most Brits 'ambivalent' about sale of Marmite to US company
US pilot rescue based on 'old woman who swallowed a fly'
sydalg
Charles to Trump: "What say we just make it a phone call instead?"
Don Quixote arrested after 'Just Stop Wind' vandalism
First image of Trump spotted on toast by faithful
Titus
Calls to rehab Hitler after learning he was bipolar
FA denies that football is caused by brain injury
Lack of public toilets - public won't take it sitting down, and won't stand for it
Malign influencers to be renamed effluencers
Migrants threatened with prosecution for not being homosexual
Putin loses Hungarian election
Russian navy to impose tolls on ships wishing to pass through English channel
Starmer maintains 'startled rabbit in headlights' image
These are not just shoplifters - these are M&S shoplifters
tonymc
I will put 350m a week into NHS like Johnson did
tonymc
Farage : Ban hate speech and we would have no party
FBI advise Charles to tape his ears down
GB News: immigrants caused Eamonn Holmes's stroke
If Andrew is jailed , will his prison get a Royal warrant ?
Liz Truss believes Trump is Jesus
Rabbi silent on Israeli murderers speaks out on arson attack
The King: 'Mama is looking down on her peasants ... as do we
Trump claims Papal election was stolen
Trump insists Iran must welcome Jesus into their Heart
Trump shooting brought back milkshake horror, says Farage
Trump wants more stuff named after him than Elizabeth II
UK Farmers warn any old excuse will push up food prices
UK recognises Mexico's right to Texas
Vatican to release new price list for Sainthood
Walter Eagle
Trump's lawyers checking if Melania's speech was start of divorce proceedings
