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Newsbiscuit Writer of the Month May 2026



Deskpilot has romped home this month with what I suspect is an all-time high score. Jeremynh has come second with a score that some months would be enough to win the title!


As usual the cartoon of the month is below the leaderboard, followed by every headline published in May




Front Page, News in Brief and Features





bbi



billclay




Chrisf



Dante



Deskpilot
























Dominic_mcg






eppursimuove







Gerontius



herculepoisson



ian searle






jeremynh



















Lockjaw



Modelmaker




Newsbiscuit




Newsbiscuit Editorial Team



Paul L



rogt





Scottfutile



SteveB




stewartbarclay



Sully



Throngsman






Titus



Walter Eagle



Wrenfoe











Cartoons published in May were submitted by: Deskpilot, Lockjaw and Modelmaker


Cartoon of the month goes to Lockjaw with C'mon, Zack Polanski, get your sh*t together


Headlines


adrian bamford 


Scotland declares independence from SNP

Sturgeon assumed luxury motorhome was part of Amazon Prime free trial


apepper             


Yale and Chubb welcome EU key proposals


ashberry            


Channel 4 cancels pilot of Arranged Marriage At First Sight UK


bigbadbob         


Jimmy Krankie never questioned being given £400k of sweets and comics


Deskpilot           


Brown and Harman explain to Keir how they resigned

Cowboy with electric car has range anxiety

Eight cures for constipation - number two will surprise you

Eight ways to break your addiction to clickbait...

Harried At First Sight

Keir wanted change. Off you go then

Knockoff Films presents: The Devil Wears Primark

Massive TACO sighted in the Strait of Hormuz

New Strictly hosts: first scandal expected by Sunday

Officials remove Andy Burnham's towel from front bench

Polanski dodged Council Tax. Greens to merge with Tories

Polanski used hypnotism to increase the size of his vote

Reform's millions will crush Andy Burnham's election plan

Small child very worried about the Santavirus

Starmer: I'm in a hole, but I'm going to dig deep

Sturgeon: he said the coffee machines were from Argos

The King's Speech Live! not as good as the film

Trump desperately pretends that peace is imminent

Trump says crap deal with Iran is brilliant

Unexpected wins for Reform at the BAFTAs


dominic_mcg    


Orange-faced cruise passenger may have Fantavirus

Suspended Sunderland councillor just not racist enough, says Reform


granger 


How long can he go on Starming?

Keir planning 'work event' piss-up for Arsenal

Time running out for Swatch watches


holeyloci           


Blair unites Labour: all agree he should f*** off


ian searle          


Britain's Got Talent is a reminder that it hasn't

German YouTuber places towel on hill at 6am to retain cheese rolling title

King dismisses bird pooh incident, "It's no worse than Andrew, or Harry have done"

Starmer admits Labour has made "unnecessary mistakes' leaving voters wondering which were necessary

UK unemployment rate unexpected to rise by at least one after the Makerfield by-election         


Jeremynh


BBC to publish photos of Poles outside dogging stations

Dead Keir walking


joe        


Local racist disputes being a Reform voter

Russian oil sanctions on slippery slope

Terrorism threat increased to "Yes"


mcdabble          


Burnham to be offered third least unsafe Labour seat

Burnham's critics say you don't get change in a cashless society

Five-party system is broken, say experts

Hanta Chance of Spreading

Hormuz War: Trump Seeks Closure

Judge decides not to criminalise rapists

NEETs to be allocated a pothole to fix

NEETs will only join workforce when it pays more than dealing, say experts

Starmer declares unilateral ceasefire for local elections

Starmer govt still struggling to please everyone

Trump threatens to withdraw troops from New York

Urgent calls for more spending on trebuchets

US says Iran is losing the ceasefire

War with Iran is over, says Trump. Unless its not


Modelmaker    

 

Girls are loud, says Nicola Roberts on birth of her daughter

New Universal theme park will accept universal credit vouchers

Peter Murrell struggling to decide on his luxury item for Desert Island Discs

Starmer seen leaflet dropping for Reform in Makerfield


Paul L   


Divorced accountant back dating


rowly   


Bloodhounds now to be trained to follow Brylcream..

Welsh museum to display "The boyo Tapestry"


Sir Lupus          

 

'Project freedom' renamed 'Operation Hokey-Cokey'


steveb  


Cuba prepares for Bay of Fat Orange Pigs

Trump signs executive order to have JR Ewing unshot


stewartbarclay  


Wes Streeting - for when you find Keir Starmer a bit too dynamic


sydalg  


Man who died of diarrhoea to be buried in pooper's grave


Throngsman 

     

New Reform councillors to commence resigning Saturday


Titus     


Failure to treat outbreak of tombola in DRC is gambling with people's lives

Met police set up special areas where violent protesters can be sterilised

Nigel Fromage likely to be the new big cheese in British politics

Scottish independence - 'If at first you don't secede, try, try & try again'

There are lies, damned lies and Truth Social

Water companies complacent as consumers say 'No pressure'


tonymc 


Brexit's 20 % drop in food prices. Any minute now. Really

Daily Mail blames Corbyn for Eurovision failure

Green Leader attacks police in desperate need for attention.

Man City search for new Head of Referee payments

Murrell qualifies for Reform shadow cabinet

Pundits agree Guadiola's skill with a cheque book unmatched.

Reform deny candidates have Bile infusions

Trump advises Starmer to start a war

UK: a Christian country with not many actual Christians

University offers new course: Understanding Student loans

Would be Trump assassins now need to book a slot

Yaxley-Lennon demands Farage share out £5m racist money




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